Monday, January 11, 2010

Get your foot off my rock!


There's a guy in Greek mythology named Sisyphus. He was cursed by the gods to push a boulder up a steep hill, over and over. Each time he reached the top of the hill, the rock would roll back down again, and he would have to begin again.

Do any of you feel like Sisyphus? I sure do. How many times have you pushed your boulder up that hill?

Remember how eager you were when you filled out that first round of paperwork for your homestudy? Fingerprints. Letter from your doctor. Recommendation forms from friends. Check! Check! Check! You practically bounced that boulder up the hill and presented your hard work to the Powers that Be.

And what did they do? They said, "Good job!" And then they kicked your boulder back down the hill.

They told you, "Now, you need NEW fingerprints for the I-600 (the first fingerprints aren't sufficient) and for your dossier you'll need LETTERS of recommendations from your friends (the forms aren't sufficient), and a NEW letter from your doctor (the old one isn't sufficient)."

"B-b-but--" you stuttered, as you watched your rock gathering speed and disappearing from sight.

You wanted to point out that you ALREADY got fingerprints, recommendations from your friends, and a clean bill of health from your doctor. But these are the Powers that Be. You knew they could crush your adoption dreams with a signature. So, you meekly trudged back down the hill after your rock.

You pushed your boulder up the hill again. Over and over. You completed your homestudy. You finished your dossier. You waited for your dossier to reach Ethiopia. You waited for your referral. You waited for your court date. You possibly waited for a second court date. And a third. Each time you climbed to the top of the mountain, only to have your boulder kicked back down the hill.

I'm so tired of that rock I could scream.

When we finally passed court I didn't feel the elation I thought I would. It was because half my attention was focused on my boulder and the toe that was hovering over it. I knew what was going to happen next. Nudge nudge. Roll roll. Down the hill it went. And now we wait for a travel date.

The difference between us and Sisyphus, of course, is that we have a little child in Ethiopia counting on us to keep on shouldering that rock up the hill.

And finally, finally, one day, we'll stand before the gates of the Holt care center in Addis. The Powers that Be will welcome up inside. They'll tell us to leave that awful boulder out in the street. We'll step through the doors and they'll introduce us to our our children. And immediately all those endless trips up the mountain will be forgotten.

I'm counting how many rocks I have left: finding out when we'll travel, waiting to travel, the 30 hour trip to Ethiopia, one night at the Union Hotel....

Not an eternity. It's doable. We can do it.

5 comments:

  1. I. LOVE. This. Post.
    I am there today... feeling almost back up to the top... but for how long?
    Got the doctor papers filled out today...
    trying to get off work early enough to get the local police clearance soon. Work, work, work!!

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  2. Lovely post...very well put! I think I have a few boulders this week ;-)

    I hope you get news of a travel date very soon!!!

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  3. Great post. If you think about it could you kick my boulder off of me. I'm slowly being crushed beneath it's weight at the foot of the hill. Stuck.
    Leah Ann

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